Communicating Love Through Quality Time

Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. (Romans 12:10)

Quality time is one of the five basic languages of love. It is some people’s primary love language, and nothing else makes them feel more loved. What is quality time? It’s giving your spouse your undivided attention. It’s more than simply being in the same room. It’s making eye contact, talking and listening sympathetically, or doing something together. What you do is not so important. Your focus is on being with each other, not the activity.

How long has it been since you planned a weekend getaway? If that seems overwhelming, maybe you should start with a night out. Or how about twenty minutes on the couch talking to each other? Better yet, ask your spouse what he/she would like to do. If quality time is your spouse’s primary love language and you haven’t been speaking that language, chances are, he or she has been complaining.

You might hear, “we don’t even spend any time together, we used to take walks, but we haven’t taken a walk together in two years.” Some might even say; “I feel like you don’t love me.” Rather than getting defensive, why not recognize the problem and respond positively? Remember, the Bible tells us to love each other genuinely and to “take delight” in pleasing and honoring each other. Say things like, “You are right honey, why don’t we take a walk this evening?”


Lord God, please help me to be aware of my spouse’s love language. Show me how I can effectively communicate love to him or her. Help me to make quality time a priority for both of us.