We know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our heart with love. (Romans 5 vs 5)
How can we love a spouse who is difficult to love? Through counselling, I have met many individuals who live in unbelievably difficult marriages. Without exception, the root problem of marital difficulties is selfishness, and the root cure is love. Love and selfishness are opposite. By nature, we are all self-centered, but when we become Christians, the Holy Spirit brings the love of God into our hearts, as Romans 5 vs 5 indicates.
Galatians 5 list the character qualities the Holy Spirit will produce in our lives if we allow Him, and these include love. We now can become God’s agents for expressing His love. Sharing His divine love flowing through us is the most powerful thing we can do for our spouse.
I want to give you the challenge I have given many people through the years. Try a six months experiment of loving your spouse unconditionally, or even try three months. Discover your spouse’s primary love language and speak it at least once a week for three to six months, no matter how you are treated in return. I have seen hard, harsh, cruel people melt long before the three/six months is over. When you let God express His love through you, you can become the agent of healing for your spouse and your marriage.
P R A Y E R
Heavenly Father, thank you for filling my heart with your love. Even when I am frustrated with my marriage, I want to commit to loving my spouse unconditionally for the next three/six months and speaking his/her love language. Please give me the determination to do this. I know you can transform my marriage.